Sunday, June 14, 2009

Farewell Ewok




Friday afternoon my two sneaky dogs, Ewok and MacDhu - who are house dogs and NOT allowed to roam - nosed the back door open and got out. By the time DreamWeaver woke up from her nap and I got home from work, they were no where in sight.Now, they have done this before occasionally despite our best efforts to prevent it, but they have always ALWAYS come home, even the 2 times they stayed gone over night over the years. So I went and looked for them, and was very worried, but not panicked, even when I finally had to give it up and go to bed. If they weren't home by tomorrow, I would panic then. Not much else to do at this point.

So...Saturday morning - yesterday - I got up at about 7:30 and went out. A few minutes later, MacDhu came up to me, alone, limping. I went over to him and petted him and said "MacDhu, where's Ewok?", at which point he began whining and crying piteously and pushing his head against my leg.
Heart sinking, I knew then...Ewok and MacDhu were inseperable by anything, but death.So I helped Macdhu inside, checked him over for injuries, but he appeared to be only strained and bruised on his left side. I told DreamWeaver what was going on, and set out with a leash and some dog treats in my car to run the local roads, looking to see if I could spot Ewok - please God! - wandering somewhere. I ran the back roads for about 40 minutes, and finally was coming down 357 back towards the house after getting gas.

And I found him about a quarter of a mile from the house in the center of the road. However it happened, it was fairly recent, just long enough for rigor to have passed off. And it was quick and clean; he was unmarked, except that his neck was broken. I pulled into a drive way further down and got a neighbor in a house there to come out and block traffic for me. I keep a blanket in my car, and I went and got his body and wrapped him in the blanket and got him out of the road and down to my car and safe. Then I had to pull over in a subdivision and cried my eyes out.We took him to the vet clinic to get him cremated and will get his ashes back.

Ewok was 12 years old, but as playful and energetic as a puppy. The only real sign of age was a faint beginning of cataracts and the fact that he had gotten very deaf over the last year. That proved his undoing, ultimately. My guess is he did not hear or see the car in the early light before dawn. MacDhu either got slammed with him at the same time, or got bumped trying to stay with the body untlil day light came. I can only guess which. So one of my precious little buddies is gone. And I feel like my heart is broken in pieces. Ewok always, as a young dog and through out his life, had a bad pattern of running off, if he wasn't on a leash or in a fenced in yard. And the way he could dig, well, fences rarely held him. Despite carefully minimizing or preventing his opportunities to run, it did happen off and on. Because of this pattern, that we never could train out of him, he was courting this death for a long time. He no longer had the reflexes of youth to protect him, and he could not dodge this one last time.

MacDhu is grieving. He will be ok, eventually. He will eat if I sit with him, and he even has played a little with his favorite toy. But its very obvious that his heart is broken too. He is moving a little better to day, and walking better, but he will not willing let me or out of his sight. I had rescued him 2 years before when he was a wandering stray dog because he and Ewok had become buddies on Ewoks daily walks back then. And MacDhu LOVES to chase cars and will hang himself on a leash to try to get one. (he may have precipitated the accident, who knows? I don't think so though because of where Ewoks body was.)
However, when I was gently walking MacDhu yesterday to go potty, a car went by and he immediately pressed up against my leg and just shook. I was horrified. If it broke MacDhu of car chasing, that would be one good thing from this nightmare, but I feel so bad for the trauma he obviously went through!

Life will go on, and time will pass. We all have wonderful memories of Ewok and will treasure him in our hearts always. Macdhu is still with us and will be ok, and we will happily spoil him rotten - er - rottener than he is already spoiled, ahem. And we will learn from Macdhu because he has important lessons to teach us. He is teaching us that it's ok to grieve. It's ok to play with your toys a little, even if you are sad. Food still tastes good, and treats are still fun. Be near to your best friends and they will help you when you are sad. And maybe squirrels really are small cats and when you are not sore any more you might just catch one. And you are not alone because you are loved. I am going to do my best to follow my sweet dog's example...I think he maybe wiser than me.

Hail and farewell Ewok! Good dog and much loved ... you will not be forgotten!

2 comments:

  1. Hugs. Many, many hugs.

    You made me cry, dammit.

    But he'll come back to you, I firmly believe that. One day you'll open the door and look down and there'll be this adorable little stray with very familiar eyes... :)

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